Archive for April, 2013

wash d.c.It is time for this blog to experience a natural death. I have enjoyed telling my story about alcoholism, and helping those who have needed it.  I have met some incredible people and I feel some good has been accomplished by this blog.

But it is time to move on.  You see, alcoholism is just a small part of who I am, and I have been ignoring the other parts of me that are so important.  I have a mission to reach thousands of people with a message of empowerment and hope, so I need to say goodbye to this blog.

I will be starting two new blogs that hopefully will help me to focus on other aspects of life that are important to me.

Thank you for following along, and if you should ever need to contact me about alcoholism you are encouraged to reach out via email at holland1145@yahoo.com.

Thank you for your friendship and I wish you all a life filled with sobriety and happiness.

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wash d.c.I lost another friend today to alcoholism.  Quite frankly I’m pissed off, as I always am each and every time this disease claims another victim.

The numbers are staggering, but they really are just numbers until it hits close to home and you realize that another human being that you knew is now gone.

I’ll make this short and sweet.  You can either choose to live or choose to die. No power on earth can make that choice for you.

Today I choose to live.

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Life Is Good

loving life on a hikeOne of my earliest mentors in AA was a man by the name of Little Joe.  When I first came into AA, Little Joe already had twenty-eight years of sobriety.  When he died several years ago he had forty-five sober years.

He was a wonderful man who always smiled and always had time to come over and shake my hand and tell me that life is good.

Life is good!  It was like a mantra to him, and he firmly believed it.

Anyway, he was a simple man with a simple philosophy.  He said if you wanted to stay sober it might be a good idea to put the plug in the jug and not drink.


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thumbnailCAE2TTDQAre you thinking about drinking?

Are you thinking that maybe just one little drink won’t hurt?

Are you thinking that this time you can control those cravings and stop after a couple?

Are you thinking that maybe if you switch to just beer it will make a difference?

Are you thinking that this time you will be able to drink like everyone else?

Are you thinking that maybe it just wasn’t as bad as you imagined it was?

Are you thinking that you just need a little more willpower and everything will be alright?

If you are thinking any of those things, then you are thinking way too much.

Welcome to the perpetual illusion of all alcoholics….it will be different this time!  Unfortunately, if you are an alcoholic, it will never be different.  The plain and simple truth is that you will never be able to drink normally again.  Those days are gone if in fact they ever existed.  You do not magically regain control of your drinking.  The disease has advanced too far and you are on a one-way street headed for more heartache, more loss and more destruction.

Bleak picture? It was meant to be. J

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teacherAn estimated 43% of U.S. adults have had someone related to them who is presently, or was, an alcoholic.

That statistic comes from “Alcoholism Information and Statistics” online, and I think that percentage is too low.  Quite frankly I don’t know of anyone in my circle of friends who has been untouched by alcoholism.

18 million Americans currently battle alcoholism.

7 million minors in the U.S. live with an alcoholic mother or father.

And on and on we go. The statistics are seemingly endless and they are always frightening.

Alcoholism kills!  Alcoholism destroys families!

There is no instant cure for alcoholism.  There is no magic elixir that will make all the pain go away and repair all the damage that has been done to family emotions and trust.

Ending the horrors of alcoholism requires a willingness to do the ugly work. It requires rolling up your sleeves, strapping on your work shoes and doing whatever is necessary to beat back the demons.

Are you willing to end the cycle of destruction? Are you willing to take responsibility and turn your life around?

The choice is yours and yes, you definitely have a choice.

If you want to take the first step, contact me and let’s chat.  Whenever anyone, anywhere reaches out for help, I want the hand of AA to always be there, and for that I AM RESPONSIBLE!


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much younger daysOh what a tangled web we weave.

Hang around AA long enough and you will have people giving you suggestions whether you asked for them or not. J  It’s only natural I guess.  There is a lot of wisdom in the halls of AA, and there are a lot of people who want to help.  There are also a lot of egos there and those egos are convinced that they know better than anyone else how to stay sober.  Again, it’s only natural.

One thing you will hear over and over again is that during early sobriety you should avoid getting involved with the opposite sex in a relationship.  If you think about it you will see the wisdom in that suggestion.

During early sobriety the recovering alcoholic is like one large exposed nerve.  There is a blizzard of emotions and feelings as the sleeping giant is awakened and life bombards them from all sides.  Early sobriety means insecurity and insecurity means looking for someone to provide security for us….and sooner or later our thoughts turn to the opposite sex for that security.

Avoid it at all costs.  Anyone standing on the wobbly legs of sobriety is not ready emotionally for the trials and tribulations of a relationship.  It is better to concentrate on your sobriety until you are strong enough to stand on your own.  Get to know yourself before trying to get to know someone else.  In the long run you will end up stronger and more capable of handling the dynamics of a relationship with another human being.

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loving life on a hikeHere is my message today for those of you who are still struggling with alcohol….are you ready?


I’m not big on making excuses.  I’m somewhat of an AA hard-ass.  By that I mean I don’t sugarcoat anything to do with alcoholism.  It is not a pretty disease.  It kills, and it not only kills the alcoholic but it destroys lives of loved ones.  How could I possibly sugarcoat that?

I have seen friends die from heart disease, failing kidneys, destroyed livers, and all related to their alcoholism.  I have had friends commit suicide and die homeless on the streets, and all because of alcoholism.

No excuses…no sugarcoating….no pats on the head saying everything will be alright….alcoholism kills.


It is a choice you know.  There is help out there if you want it.  If you don’t want it then you are making a choice…if you do want it you are making a choice.  I am here if you need someone to talk to….AA is there….millions of other people will help you if you want them to…..or….

You can choose to die.


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miscellaneous....and steph 003I don’t remember the last time I was drunk on Easter.  That realization hit me yesterday as we were enjoying family and life.

We saw all five of our kids yesterday and people came and went.  No big meal was served.  Everyone just grabbed something from the fridge, and we played in the sunshine and built our chicken coop.

None of the joys I now experience would be possible if I was still drinking.  None of them.

I am incredibly blessed to be living a life of sobriety.  I am surrounded by loving people who fill my life with joy.  Life is good sober and it can be for you as well.  All you have to do is want it badly enough.

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